The Truth About Finland
Finland is located between Sweden and Russia, though it’s thinking of moving somewhere warmer, or doing a swap with Greece for awhile. Maybe during the off-season, when there are fewer tourists.
Here are some important things you should know about Finland:
- The name “Finland” is derived from the fact that the people all have fins instead of hands. They’re fish people! Auuughh!!
- But: they produce delicious cod roe. Even the men!
- Finland’s three major industries are manufacturing realistic-looking fake hands to cover their disconcerting fin-hands, swimming around aimlessly all day, and breathing through their freakish neck-gills.
- Finland is a wonderful country to visit, unless you are plankton, or a worm at the end of a fishing hook.
A poor second to Belgium when going abroad.