Titan: Somewhere, Out There

Saturn’s moon Titan is the only moon in the solar system that meets the requirements of having life: it has an atmosphere, water and a cable system that shows “Spongebob” repeats.

What would life on Titan be like? Scientists believe life on Titan would be extremely rudimentary, without an active brain. So basically, like those losers you went to high school with who never left town, the poor dopes.

Of course, it’s likely there’s no life on Titan at all. The temperature is extremely cold, because Titan is so far from the Sun, and the thermostat is always kept at 62. Also, Titan’s atmosphere contains a great deal of methane, which may be due to tiny, microbe-sized cows.

Will we ever find life on Titan? I hope not–I still owe them money from our trip to Atlantic City last year.

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