The Tongue: Yuck

Your tongue is that meaty thing flapping around in your mouth when you talk. And talk and talk and talk. Seriously, just shut up already. What are you even going on about? We’ve all heard that story about that time you saw the guy from that one TV show or whatever at the In-n-Out Burger on Sepulveda like, a million times already. We don’t care anymore. That show’s been off the air since like 1998, anyway. Zip it.

Here are a few things you need to know about your tongue:

  • You know who sticks his tongue out a lot, is Gene Simmons from the band KISS. This was pretty kick-ass back in the day, but now that he’s pushing 80 it’s really kind of gross and we wish he would just stop it already.
  • Also: everyone in KISS needs to put on a damn shirt at this point. Because, no. Just no.
  • Your tongue is filled with delicious, creamy chocolate and caramel. Bite down hard on it right now for a taste treat!
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