Lions: Oh, Really?

Everyone’s familiar with Disney’s “The Lion King,” if only because of all those crappy Elton John songs (seriously, was the dude from Styx busy?). But lions don’t live in a kingdom–they live in a Socialist state that threatens the very fabric of American life!

For instance, lions have universal health care, which probably means they have Death Panels that decide which lions will die as a result of a thorn in the paw, since they probably don’t cover thorn-removal-by-mouse.

In this country, many political pundits believe that Barack Obama was not only born in Kenya, but is also a crypto-lion, waiting for the right moment to force leonine-style Socialism down our freedom-loving throats. Conservatives believe that Obama is preparing to introduce such feline fascist ideas as mandatory gazelle killing and roaring before the start of MGM movies. Be vigilant! And email Disney to get them to get the Styx guy to do the music for “The Lion King 2: Circle Of Kicking Ass.”

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