Ducks: Somewhat Animal-Like

People always ask us here at Disalmanac, how do ducks float? But the more important question is, WHY do ducks float? Ducks can freaking FLY, for crying out loud. Would you sit around with a damp butt in dirty water all day if YOU could fly? WTF, ducks? Get it together!

Here are a few more important facts about ducks you will need to know for the test:

  • Hey, University of Oregon–nobody is quaking in fear when they have to play the Ducks. Get a REAL mascot.
  • This goes double for the NHL’s Mighty Ducks. Yeah, ducks are mighty. Mighty BORING. Also, when the pond freezes over, the ducks won’t be the ones body-slamming opposing players into the boards, they’ll be the ones with their butts frozen into the ice. More like the Sitting Ducks. Tcha. As if.
  • Also, we don’t get Duck L’Orange. Is it like a duck creamsicle?
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