Bighorn Sheep: Some Sort Of Reptile Or Something

The bighorn sheep is a sheep with big horns. Really, zoologists? That’s the best name you could come up with? Do you have no sense of poetry or imagination? Calling it a bighorn sheep is like calling a great white shark a toothyfish, or a cheetah a kitty with spots, or a tufted titmouse, well, a tufted titmouse.

Here are several names right off the top of my head that would be way, way better than bighorn sheep:

  • Shotar, The Sheep Of Awesomeness.
  • Hornzilla.
  • Super Ram.
  • Deathsheep 5000.
  • Headbutts Of Doom.
  • The Holy Shit, It’s Coming Right At Us! RUN!
  • Bondor, God of Darkness.
  • Fluffycuddles McKillyounow.
  • Lefty.

But sadly, the National Sheep Council refuses to take our calls, and they did say something about a restraining order. So, we’re stuck with the name “bighorn sheep.” Maybe we can start calling zoologists, “Unimaginative Loser-Asses.”


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