Badgers: Nature’s Badgers

The lovable little badger is the state animal of Wisconsin. At least, it was until Wisconsin’s governor fired all the badgers, a move he claimed would save the state $7 million. Unfortunately, the move is expected to cost the state over $300 million in badger unemployment claims, badger Medicaid, and badger alcoholism treatment.

Here are a few facts about badgers:

  • Now that they don’t have jobs, badgers have been forced to move back into their parents’ basement, and their parents have all these stupid rules, like no overnight guests and no loud burrowing after 11PM. Badgers really resent being treated like children.
  • Badgers check Craigslist every day, but there just aren’t any listings for state animal anywhere. They did apply for the position of state insect of Utah, but were told they weren’t right for the job.
  • But it’s OK, badgers LIKE the taste of ramen. Really. Yum. Ramen.
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