The Cod: Nature’s Fish

The cod is a very depressed fish, living in the dark depths of both the water and its own soul. The cod doesn’t really see the point of getting up in the morning, and but so usually spends the entire day in bed, watching Judge Judy and the Maury Povich Show.

Here are a few facts about the cod:

  • The cod has the most extensive collection of Smiths and Morrissey albums, EPs and singles in the entire world.
  • They tried Prozac for a while, but they just ended up with the the side effects: an even bigger lack of sexual desire, and even more suicidal thoughts.
  • The cod’s friends are kind of losing their patience and wish the cod would just fucking snap out of it.
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