Silkworms: Nature’s Silkworms

Silkworms look gross and icky, but they poop silk. They poop silk! Man, how cool is that? If I pooped silk, I’d be a millionaire! And indeed, silkworms are all millionaires, flying off in their Lear jets to fancy vacations in Rio or on the French Riviera, hanging out on Martha’s Vineyards with Puff Daddy and the Kennedys, and getting out of limousines while not wearing underwear with Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan. And yet, silkworms pay no income tax, because they’re not technically “people.” Damn you, silkworms!

Here are a few more facts about silkworms:

  • The MTV show “My Super Silkworm 16” is about the obscenely expensive parties that silkworms throw when they emerge from their cocoons.
  • Another TV show, “Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous Silkworms,” will also fill you with class-based rage.
  • Seriously, silkworms–stop flaunting your poop-based wealth in our faces! Fuck you, silkworms!
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