Brussels: A City Some Damn Place

So, Brussels is one of those Europe cities. They use that Europe money and speak one of those fancy Europe languages like French of Bjorn or something.

They think they’re all better than us over there in Europe. Well, screw you, Europe. We may not have your fancy Europe museums or your fancy Europe Burger Kings, but we have something you don’t: feet. No one in Brussels has feet; it’s some kind of weird Europe thing they do over there, lopping off your feet when you hit puberty. In the US of A, we’re not told by some Europe government that we have to lop off our feet; we lop off our feet when we’re good and ready. If we want to lop off our feet when we hit puberty, we do. If we want to wait until our early 20s, well, that’s OK too. It’s our choice! And if some people want to experiment in college with lopping off their hands instead, well, that’s their affair, even though the Bible says it’s a mortal sin.

So that’s everything you need to know about Brussels.

 

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