Miami, located above the Arctic Circle, is the Land of the Midnight Sun. Polar bears and caribou frolic all summer long on the frozen tundra. Ice road truckers deliver ice roads to all the residents. Putin happily rears his head morning, noon and night.
Of course, winter is a different story. Several feet of snow make travel impossible. Wily glaciers stalk and attack any Miamian who ventures out of their igloo. Of course, most Miami residents avoid this fate by hibernating for the entire winter, curling up with grizzly bears in their cozy caves.
Then in the spring, Miamians and grizzly bears alike awake from their slumber, and, stretching and yawning, blinkingly enter a bright new world. New man-cubs are born (what, you think Miamians and grizzly bears spend all that time just sleeping?) and the cycle of life begins anew in beautiful Miami.