Harry Truman: A President Guy Dude

Back when Harry Truman was president, people used to say, “Give ’em Hell, Harry!” This was because the Oval Office is built over a hell mouth.

Oh, don’t act so surprised. You’ve seen the evil that’s come out of the Oval office over the years. Rutherford B. Hayes wasn’t even human, but some sort of demon-like hell-spawn beast with red eyes and a thirst for human blood. And, of course, Exhibit B: Dick Cheney.

So when Harry Truman was having a little trouble with Congress, he’d simply throw the Speaker of the House down the hell mouth for an hour or two. When the screaming became unbearable, Truman would let the Speaker out and start negotiating; he usually got everything he wanted. Sure, we lost dozens of House Speakers that way, but dammit, things got done. Man, those were the days.

 

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