Feet: Part Of Your Damn Body

Feet. They’re those funny-looking things down there at the end of your leg-things. And they stink to high heaven, Chester.

Seriously–do you ever wash those things? Do French gourmets follow you around, thinking that you’re made of delicious stinky cheese that they can use in their sauces? Do Odor-Eaters whimper in terror when they see you coming? Do people who leave your house for a breath of fresh air go directly to the nearest open sewer? And what’s that crap living between your toes? That is some disgusting shit, Slappy.

Our advice: ditch the feet. Remove them and replace them with something that doesn’t smell so bad, like, say, dead badgers. Thank you.

 

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