Montana: It’s A Damn State, OK?

Montana calls itself the Big Sky State. But how big is Montana’s sky, really?

Turns out, Montana’s sky is completely average. Maybe even a little smaller than average. Like many states, it likes to brag about sky size.

Women are often disappointed to see such an average sky after all of Montana’s bragging about how big its sky is, though they usually keep it to themselves. It’s not the size of the sky, they say, it’s the motion of the clouds.

But why all this braggadocio about sky size, anyway? Montana is clearly overcompensating for its smaller-than-average sky. Obviously, Montana has some issues vis a vis insecurity.

What’s Montana so insecure about? We may never know. Perhaps it was teased mercilessly in gym class in junior high school. Perhaps Montana wrestles with feelings towards other states that it’s not ready to admit.

But one thing’s for sure: if you want a state with a really massive sky, go to Arkansas. Their sky’s so huge, it’s actually painful without proper lubrication.


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